The last few days I've been in a funk...and usually I dont blog when I'm in these sorts of moods because I dont really want yucky negativity pouring out but this actually helps me sometimes...not sure if its the lack of sleep, the family drama going on lately or my inability to find time for things I enjoy, but I've been stressed and its affecting me in the worst way possible - increasing my milk supply
if you know me, you know how strongly I feel about providing the person who is my whole world the best thing for her..now what would I do if I can no longer give her that?
devastated.
if you know me, you know how strongly I feel about providing the person who is my whole world the best thing for her..now what would I do if I can no longer give her that?
devastated.
Yesterday evening I went to a La Leche meeting that was held at my local Whole Foods to hopefully find some answers and with everything discussed it occurred to me that its my own anxiety over breast feeding that is a part of the problem. Every time I pump slightly less that what I expect to I have a panic attack and I'm on edge the rest of the day...making the next pumping even less..its like a domino effect. I'm just so adamant about making sure I never ever have to feed her formula that I get so worked up over it and I shouldn't because I'm just making it worse.
so from now on I need to take a step back, breathe and focus on all the good things instead of the bits of negativity.
so from now on I need to take a step back, breathe and focus on all the good things instead of the bits of negativity.
Sienna's naps during the day are short and I find myself scrambling to get things done in the short time I have...things like well um eating, getting myself ready for the day, pumping showering, cleaning up...all things I should be doing now actually. Sometimes a mama just needs a breather. There are loads of laundry to be done, house to be cleaned emails to be responded to, headbands to be made ( I really miss making them, its been a little while)
I have much more respect for single moms now because I could never handle it on my own, As soon as Dan walks through the door from work hes ready to be a hands on Dad & husband..taking the baby right away giving me a break, taking the dog for a walk and getting started on dinner...he usually makes me a cocktail too :) if I had just pumped or fed that is. He came with me to the La Leche meeting & being the only Dad there the group leaders were very pleasantly surprised & impressed with his support and willingness to learn ways to help me out. This morning there was a pot of oatmeal waiting for me on the stove. So instead of stressing over little things like the house being a huge mess & not having time to clean...I really need to focus on my biggest blessings...Him & Sienna.
My little sunshine this morning
I'm in tears! You're an amazing mother! Sienna is so lucky to have you as a mommy! I'll be praying for you! I know how stressful breast feeding can be. I only lasted about 3 months because I just never produced enough. I am still hard on myself to this day, and annalynn is 14 months old now... Bless your heart. Hang in there! If you need anything let me know :) cheer up momma! You have an amazing hubby and a beautiful perfect daughter! Lots of love for you! ��
ReplyDeleteI'm in tears! You're an amazing mother! Sienna is so lucky to have you as a mommy! I'll be praying for you! I know how stressful breast feeding can be. I only lasted about 3 months because I just never produced enough. I am still hard on myself to this day, and annalynn is 14 months old now... Bless your heart. Hang in there! If you need anything let me know :) cheer up momma! You have an amazing hubby and a beautiful perfect daughter! Lots of love for you! ��
ReplyDeleteAww I've felt that way before I felt like I failed as a mother , when my milk supply decreased. All I can say is things do get better plus you have an amazing husband that helps you out as much as he can :) keep your head up high
ReplyDeleteHang in there girl and it is stressing that decreases it when u pump a little less than normal think of your stash or the children that don't get it at all. When I was working full time I did the same thing with my supply until someone told me to stop making it so much a chore and make it more of a habit that helped me
ReplyDeleteI remember feeling like that, too. It can be so overwhelming at times. I recommend just pumping in the morning. You have the most milk then and because you are a stay at home mom you don't need a ton of frozen milk. Just for the convience of having a drink like you said or going out or for emergencies. My daughter only napped for short periods of time, too for a while. I used to put her in the Ergo while I did laundry. I would put her in the bouncer or entertainment center while I did dishes. I learned I could only shower at night (& still do) after she went to sleep. I rarely cooked dinner and my husband, like yours, stepped up big time. It will get more manageable as you adjust and figure out how and when you can get things done. But, sometimes leave the housework. I had the gym mat upstairs and she did tummy time while I got dressed & put on makeup in the mornings. I had to do this to feel alive. :) Definitely make sure you are eating to keep up your calories. Freeze meals, make quick meals, etc. Remind yourself that you are doing an amazing job!!
ReplyDeleteI remember feeling like that, too. It can be so overwhelming at times. I recommend just pumping in the morning. You have the most milk then and because you are a stay at home mom you don't need a ton of frozen milk. Just for the convience of having a drink like you said or going out or for emergencies. My daughter only napped for short periods of time, too for a while. I used to put her in the Ergo while I did laundry. I would put her in the bouncer or entertainment center while I did dishes. I learned I could only shower at night (& still do) after she went to sleep. I rarely cooked dinner and my husband, like yours, stepped up big time. It will get more manageable as you adjust and figure out how and when you can get things done. But, sometimes leave the housework. I had the gym mat upstairs and she did tummy time while I got dressed & put on makeup in the mornings. I had to do this to feel alive. :) Definitely make sure you are eating to keep up your calories. Freeze meals, make quick meals, etc. Remind yourself that you are doing an amazing job!!
ReplyDelete