Tuesday, June 4, 2013

Lessons & Regrets

Big or small...we all have them
here are some of my parenting lessons & regrets

1. we could have all had the same birthday, but we don't because of me

Let me explain...

 of course the ultimate goal was to have a healthy baby whenever she was ready to come into the world we would be over the moon. We weren't really set on the day being our birthday...well maybe we were a little, but we tried not to be. My due date, birthday and hubbys birthday were on a Monday....Saturday I started leaking fluid but didn't think much of it because it wasn't a large amount....(what did I know, I had no idea what going into labor was like) Sunday...I did a lot of walking and by the evening more fluid...we called my midwife and she said its probably just extra discharge and if I wanted I could go to the hospital to get checked....I decided not to go, Danny thought I should but ultimately it was up to me....Monday I went to see my midwife and sure enough the leaking was my water trickling out...straight to the hospital and on pitocin I went..I labored for a very long time which made her birthday the day after ours...Now, had I gone in Sunday...I would have been kept and she would have been born on March 12th...triple family birthday. I think about it often, and its sillly cuz not like I could take it back and I should be grateful she's here, healthy as can be...but sometimes this invades my head and I start to beat myself up a bit.

Here is my full birth story

2. Newborn photos

After many many many hours of labor, a c section, stressful and unsuccessful breast feeding attempts I was so beat I didn't even feel human and I hardly took photos of her in the hospital. In our house I'm in charge of photos...my husband gave up on trying to take them because he says I'm hard to please when it comes to photos. Of course when I was laying cut open on the operating table I wasn't able to take any of her first few minutes of life... and though he tried to take some...they're horrible...I cried when I saw them ( this is why he doesnt want to bother)  to this day, I still give him grief about how he messed up the most important photos he ever could have taken. Whatever setting he had on the camera...made her look RED like a creepy kind of red...see for yourself...

ugh...yep and they're all this bad

luckily, my anaesthesiologist took a wonderful family photo of us. 
That at least made up for some of these.

3. The swing

It was both a blessing and a curse, but less of a blessing and more of a curse I would say. Not until maybe a month ago were we able to wean Sienna off of it. She refused to nap anywhere else....it made it hard to put her down to sleep in her crib at night because she was so used to the rocking she'd wake up in the crib and was impossible to even lay down. Eventually the night sleeping became normal in the crib, but she would only take naps in the swing. The motor even gave out from being used so much with such a big kid, Fisher price was nice enough to send us a new motor. Its good as new and will certainly not be kept for the next baby, we are listing in on craigslist this weekend.

4.  Believing that top of the line stuff is better

I would have easily traded my Bugaboo & boon highchair for something else. You see celebrities sporting these things and you think gosh it must be the best! nope, its not...its all in the name. With the bugaboo..other than its stylish look and easy glide, I dont think its worth the money. Same with the high chair, it never seemed like Sienna was comfortable in it...the straps are not safe and the tray is tiny. Is it appealing and stylish to the eye? absolutely....but is that what's important?

5. Letting doctors get to me

To be perfectly honest, I don't trust them. I take everything what they say with a grain of salt, and use my own judgment in the ultimate decision. I remember stressing out soo much one time because Siennas head was flat and still cone shaped at a few months old...her doctor said we would have to get her a special helmet...a helmet that is 4K out of pocket, not covered by insurance because its considered for a cosmetic purpose. I was so upset. I started to lay her down on her side wedging a rolled up blanket on her side and propping her up more...her head started getting better after a week and is now perfect, no was helmet needed. 


  1. I loved reading this, even though that sounds horrible! Its reassuring to see that behind the beautiful 'perfect family' photos is a normal family with the same concerns as everyone else :)

    Doctors really annoy me too. We're lucky here that they aren't as pushy, but they are just as useless!

    And what you said about the photos - the C-Section one of her popping out on the other post is amazing. You might not have as many as you want but you have photos and I guess some people dont even have one or two.

    As for the birthday thing, well I bet you anything she will say shes a day after because they 'saved the best til last' :) You never know, it might be more special that she gets her very own day all to herself in years to come when she can appreciate her day with her parents, then her day with her friends :)

    You're a fab Momma and an even fab...er role model :) xxxx

  2. OMG, YES to all of this. I have horrific pictures from the twins, yuck ones from #3, and awesome shots of #4 because the anesth. nurse grabbed my DSLR and has camera skills. I was so thankful to have ONE great pic of us in the operating room.

  3. The weight thing is big for me right now. My new baby was preemie and not catching up like I wish he would. He is zero percentile!!! My husband keeps reminding me that of course he is not on the chart yet- he was so early. Parenting is never ending stress.

  4. One of the things I regret most is not getting a single family picture in the Hospital. Who does that???


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