oh suga suga

Cant deny that Hubs and I have a huge sweet tooth

we are serious dessert fiends 

our pantry always has a variety of at least 3 different kinds of cookies, chocolates, muffins.

&& lets not even talk about our freezer...its ice cream galore in there...from cones, to bars, to homemade...you name it...and then there are Trader Joes lava cakes...my all time favorite dessert and always in my freezer... if you haven't had one, you're missing out.

 I cant even tell you how many times I've said to Danny, 

" we are not baking anything for a while I have weight to lose"

who am I kidding 

 one pintrest visit and I'm done, 
will power is gone and my the post pregnancy belly pooch is not 

5 more lbs to go & its all in the poooch

this is what we baked this past weekend, as you can see I'm really sticking to my "lets not bake for a while" plan ( evil pintrest )

it was so so good and I just had a slice for breakfast...I'm so bad.

raspberry-dark-chocolate-banana-bread

weekend scene

Time is moving far too quickly for my likings these days, Aug is just around the corner which means we'll be packing for NY in a couple of weeks, did I mention how much I'm dreading the whole packing thing? knowing me, I'll pack her whole nursery up and I'll be the crazy lady in the airport with 20 bags.

 On a brighter note, End of Aug brings an end to 3 digit temperatures in AZ which means September till June the Leifs will be spending most of their time outside enjoying perfect weather in the 60s,70s,80s.....so worth the brutal 3 months.

Anywho, our weekend flew by as usual....but it was a good one none the less with the exception of making the mistake of going to IKEA on a Sunday afternoon, what were we thinking? seriously. I must have said "excuse me" more times than ever in my life, trying to get by swarms of people with a stroller, but we did get what we went for (book shelves for Siennnas room) so it wasn't a complete waste.

few photos from our weekend

Sienna enjoying a snack while people bumping watching in Ikea

We had lunch with our fellow foodie friends, we tried English food at the Cornish Pasty it was definitely different, but good. Sienna's face in this picture cracks me up, she wasn't thrilled about her  little friend Liam...I think this is her one only crying picture.

Look at his thighs compared to miss petite Sienna 

We made plans to meet at our community pool with the next door neighbors who have a little girl but a storm kicked us out after 10 mins...it poured out of nowhere! gotta love monsoon season in AZ but Sienna loved used a floatie her Auntie got her for the first time!

weekend July 27-29th

Hope you're all having a good weekend

here is a teeny glimpse of ours :)

From baby to little lady

July 27th 2012 

Dearest Princess,

I keep staring at this picture of you that I took yesterday realizing how much you have grown & changed and it seems like it happen over night, I see more and more of your Daddy in you every day...except for that sweet dimple..you got that from your mama...and I've been told that mine only shows when I'm really happy and smiling reallly big...which since you've been born is all the time....you melt my heart, brighten up my days and even bring out a dimple I never knew I had until you came into my life.

Each day as you grow,

so does my love for you

-Mommy

I need to vent...

At Sienna's 4 month check up, her pediatrician made me feel like a bad mother because her weight isn't up to par with other babies her age...well guess what? shes an idiot, and I regret wasting time being worried about this

this article  says it all -

(best I've read in a while - the 4 month section is Sienna to the tee)

 The percentiles comparing babies include those who are formula fed who are 'chubbier' than breast fed babies due to the unnecessary water weight and crap that formula contains and since most babies arent breast fed those percentiles are very off.

You know what else makes me angry? the mothers who don't even try to breast feed, off the bat they just go straight to formula...why wouldn't you at least try? its the best thing for your baby and its FREE.


and its one thing if a mom just cant produce milk or doesnt produce enough, so of course formula is perfectly ok

Do you know how many times I've cried when it was really hard? how painful it was in the begining, how annoying and frustrating it can be? do you think I enjoy pumping every 2 hours and washing pump parts?  not being able to be out of the house for too long because I have to pump

well guess what? I HATE IT, but I would never give it up

 because its the BEST thing for my baby and what kind of mother would I be if didn't chose whats better for her because it was just too inconvenient for me?

I know a mom whos baby is a month older than Sienna 

 He is sick constantly! ear infection, fevers, you name it.
(formula fed) need I say more?

oh and here is my favorite statistic of them all,

low income moms who are on food stamps formula feed most!

are you kidding me? I swear if I made the rules those mothers would not be getting free formula unless there was a medical reason they couldn't breast feed

http://www.thealphaparent.com/2011/12/timeline-of-breastfed-baby.html

Friendships

Those that come, those that go.

Lately I find myself pondering friendship

why a friendship that lasted years just drifts apart?

what was it that held it together in the first place? 

sometimes you just cant help by ask yourself what you did wrong?

and sometimes the answer is 

NOTHING

you did nothing.

It just happens, our lives pull us in different directions....generally & geographically speaking

and some friendships just aren't strong enough to endure it, sad as but true.

I guess the point that I am in my life right now, "grown up"  and "seattled down" I really just long for realness in the realationships I have with people. 

And life, well it happens...you cant avoid it or stop it. 

People change, lives change

Friendships are suppose to last a lifetime aren't they? If they do,

Cherish them, 

Love them, 

WORK HARD AT THEM

 and most of all

Hold on to them for dear life

As for the other "friends" that go 

well, sometimes...

we just have to let them.

This song is what inspired this post,

 I cant get tired of it & its meaning.

3D Butterfly tutorial

I finally completed a little project I started weeks ago for Sienna's room, upon request I'm sharing the tutorial.

I got the inspiration  from this project I saw on pintrest, 

I found a simple butterfly shape & printed it out on thick paper in 3 different sizes, I omitted the antennas as it would be impossible to cut around them.

I used song lyrics to Siennas song 

Rascal Flatts - My wish

I chose a pretty font and had the lyrics repeated on whole page avoiding too much spacing

 ( the thicker the paper you print it on the more durable and easier when tracing)

I also used a sheet of pink scrapbooking paper so that not all butterflies were white 

the blisters I got from cutting these out one by one were no fun but worth it

Fold the butterfly for a 3D effect

This is what I used to stick it to the wall - other things work too I just happen to have this laying around

My little helper ;)

 sweet girly accent to my girls nursery :)

Mondays suck

Although my reason why may be different from yours, 

I really dislike Mondays

 As much as I love my time with Sienna during the week, there is nothing like the weekend when Daddy can spent time with us too...Our time together as a family is so precious to me, even when we are not doing anything besides lounging around together, I still soak up every minute and thank god for blessing me with this sweet little family.

The weekends are such a tease! Mondays come too quick and Sunday evenings are full of 

"I wish didn't have to leave you girls tomorrow" and "I'm going to miss you all week" And I know this may sound silly because not like hes leaving for a month, but we do everything together & 8 hour work days just seem so long, he hates missing anything new Sienna does & I hate when I cant share...upon request I send him at least 10 pictures a day of Sienna and sometimes we leave skype on so he can see us while sitting at his desk at work.

Call us crazy but we really think

"its always better when we're together" -JJ

Sienna long legs

This jumperoo toy was the best purchase ever!

It was worth it for the entertainment I get just from watching her little long legs go all wild in this thing - it cracks me up.

Entertainment for us both haha

plus it buys me some time in the kitchen to clean up or actually EAT in peace

how cute are those legs? 

Swim Lesson

My four month old is going to learn how to swim before I do

Sienna had her first swim lesson yesterday evening & she loved it ( so did we)

We'll for sure continue taking her every week, it makes her so tired she sleeps great after...win win for everyone.

next time I'll go in with her too, this time I just wanted to watch & take some photos for keepsake purposes, cuz you know me and and my need for capturing every precious moment :)

all things natural

My poor baby is teething and I think I'm taking it harder than she is, whatever hurts her hurts me 1000x more

several people asked me why I wouldn't give her things like oragel - I try and stay far away from anything unnatural & anything containing chemicals....I myself don't even take any medicine if I can find natural remedies instead and not unless I'm in severe pain.

Menstrual cramps? 

yoga sequence, woman's moon cycle tea, heating pad, bath

no Midol for me, ever.

common cold?

Garlic, Vitamin D, tea with honey

no artificial vicks syrups for me.

tooth ache?

raw onion, vanilla extract

no Advil or Tylenol for me.

So now that you know how I work, 

my teething remedy for Sienna should surprise you :)

happy chemical free baby = mission accomplished

Sienna's uneventful 4 Month check up

The battle between what your doctor tells you...what your friends & family tell you and what you yourself believe.

Yesterday Sienna had her 4 month check up & I walked out of the doctors office pretty upset and torn between many different point of views

ps- I really don't like doctors, I wish their primary concern really was the well being of someone instead of $$$ but that's another blog post in itself.

Anyway,

Sienna's Stats were:

weight: 11.9oz (5-10th percentile)

height: 26" (95th percentile)

head: 15" (40th percentile)

Her low percentile for weight was the first thing the doctor made me feel was a 'concern'  

is it a concern or is it not? 

As far as I know, breast fed babies tend to be more slender than formula fed because of all the extra crap in formula and the percentile chart include babies who are both breast & formula fed. Cant it just depend on the child? I myself was a very slim growing up and I'm perfectly fine. Then the subject of spit up came up, and yes Sienna spits up a lot. When I told the doctor that she immediately suggested putting her on medicine for it as it could be the reason why shes not gaining weight - not ingesting enough or that her body isnt absorbing the calories.

REALLY?!!!  babies spit up! its what they do, they have tiny tummies and not a fully developed digestive system yet - why on earth would I give her medicine for this? I don't know one baby that doesn't spit up & they grow out of it.

She also mentioned that her head is getting flat in the back & scared me with the possibility of her needing a helmet if it doesn't correct itself.


Now, the way to correct this is to keep her propped up sitting up as much as possible, and make her sleep on her side.When I put her in the high chair I got a lot of grief about how its bad for her back to make her sit up before she can on her own. So I put away the high chair, exersaucer and thought well I guess it makes sense, because my mom & other women in my family who are in Poland believed the same thing and told me I shouldn't use the Bumbo chair either.  So I thought well since my mom, family members & other people think its wrong I guess it is and when you're a first time mom making these judgement calls is not always easy


But this explains why many Eastern European people I know (myself included) have slightly flat heads ( I know this sounds silly, but its hard to describe and unless you run your hand down the back of my head you'll never know) - they believe no baby should be sat up until 6 months and need to be carried in the cradling position only...they take this very seriously & remember my mom lecturing me when she saw a pic of Sienna in her bumbo. 


Sometimes you just have to go with what you think is right and forget what everyone else says, even when it means disregarding your moms advice and beliefs.

Both of us needed some cheering up 

so we put together her jumperoo when we got home 

(she loves it) & I'm ok with her 'sitting up' I think if a baby has full head control its ok

She may be a little skinny minnie supermodel in the making but shes happy, healthy & perfect to us.

AND

 she has a swimming lesson tonight!

I'll post about how it went :)

Giveaway- WINNER

I wish I was able to give all of you guys a phone case - you're all so sweet

to make it fair - I asked my husband to pick a number from 1-15 

( he had no idea what for) and whos ever comment was that number was the winner

he picked 5

I'll be emailing you Ashely for your address :) 

ps: I enjoyed doing this - more give aways to come!

                                       

Giveaway - just follow my blog and leave a comment on this post with your email and I'll chose a random winner later on today :)

cloud over my head

The last few days I've been in a funk...and usually I dont blog when I'm in these sorts of moods because I dont really want yucky negativity pouring out but this actually helps me sometimes...not sure if its the lack of sleep, the family drama going on lately or my inability to find time for things I enjoy, but I've been stressed and its affecting me in the worst way possible - increasing my milk supply


if you know me, you know how strongly I feel about providing the person who is my whole world the best thing for her..now what would I do if I can no longer give her that?


devastated.

 Yesterday evening I went to a La Leche meeting that was held at my local Whole Foods to hopefully find some answers and with everything discussed it occurred to me that its my own anxiety over breast feeding that is a part of the problem. Every time I pump slightly less that what I expect to I have a panic attack and I'm on edge the rest of the day...making the next pumping even less..its like a domino effect. I'm just so adamant about making sure I never ever have to feed her formula that I get so worked up over it and I shouldn't because I'm just making it worse. 

so from now on I need to take a step back, breathe and focus on all the good things instead of the bits of negativity.

 Sienna's naps during the day are short and I find myself scrambling to get things done in the short time I have...things like well um eating, getting myself ready for the day, pumping showering, cleaning up...all things I should be doing now actually. Sometimes a mama just needs a breather. There are loads of laundry to be done, house to be cleaned emails to be responded to, headbands to be made ( I really miss making them, its been a little while) 

I have much more respect for single moms now because I could never handle it on my own, As soon as Dan walks through the door from work hes ready to be a hands on Dad & husband..taking the baby right away giving me a break, taking the dog for a walk and getting started on dinner...he usually makes me a cocktail too :) if I had just pumped or fed that is. He came with me to the La Leche meeting & being the only Dad there the group leaders were very pleasantly surprised & impressed with his support and willingness to learn ways to help me out. This morning there was a pot of oatmeal waiting for me on the stove. So instead of stressing over little things like the house being a huge mess & not having time to clean...I really need to focus on my biggest blessings...Him & Sienna.

My little sunshine this morning

4 months old

Dearest Sienna,
         I'm not going to start off by saying how fast time has gone by (even though this is very true). And I'm not going to tell you that I wish you'd stay my little baby forever ( even though that is all I dream about)but I will tell you this...You.Are.Absolutely.Breathtaking. I'm sure if you could talk you would first say"can you please stop kissing me every minute of everyday?"  to me...no kisses are ever enough. Oh boy, here come the waterworks...you are my world, our world and I want nothing more but to be your world.  I dream of the day when you can wrap your arms around me and say "I love you mama" I love you sweet girl, more than you'll know.

this is your new favorite silly face to make...hiding your lips

 here is a little bit about you this month...

you're a drooly-mess all day long and I'm pretty certain that you are teething because everything goes in your mouth and sometimes you act like you're in discomfort as you try to chew on things...this breaks my heart.

You love bath time, especially splashing and making me soaking wet, I'll get you back one day dont you worry

you love to squeal & 'talk" it always makes me laugh

you still have to have a blanket to snuggle with when you go to sleep

and guess what? I did the exact same thing as a baby :)  I love that we already have little things in common.

Your current favorite toy is the O-ball

You just started noticing Charlie this month, you love watching him and he ALWAYS manages to make you smile, you find it real funny when he sneezes - you crack up out loud when he does and whenever I say "Charlie" you immediately look down on the floor to spot him out (smart girl you are) I just cant stand when he tries to lick you, I know hes doing it because he loves you but he also licks his butt.

With lots of pumping at hard work

you are exclusively breast fed and still going strong! 

you also have a frozen stock pile that could last you several months and guess what? you wont be having cows milk for a VERY long time...I thank my lucky stars every day that I do not have to give you formula - it would kill me to.

I'm not sure you weight & length yet - your well visit is in 2 days but I think you're pretty tall and you're lean, not chubby like most babies...so I'm going to guess that you're 12lbs and 25"

 ( I'll post wed when I know)

You are changing so much!

Your eyes are still very blue and I think they're here to stay, 

though they could also changeto green which would make more sense, unless you take after Grandma who has super blue eyes.

here is a little secret I never admitted....when you were in my belly I really hoped you'd have light eyes because Daddy's dark hair & green eyes is what made me fall for him...I cant think of a more attractive & unique combo...regardless, you're beautiful no matter what.

Your Firsts

1st 'ponytail' (teeny tiny one just for mamas entertainment- sorry)

1st time slept through the night - thanks for the tease little lady, you still wake up once or twice every night & sometimes just for a paci

1st time in your high chair (just for a few minutes)

1st time meeting your cousin Olivia

1st time holding your own bottle

1st time in your excersaucer - you weren't a fan so mama put it away for a while

1st time loving & really noticing Charlie

I love your curisocity and how you love to watch us go about our days,

weather we're eating dinner or shopping...those big eyes of yours sure love taking it all in

I love each day with you & I always look forward to whats to come

Love always,

Mommy

remember him?

I don't talk about poor Charles much anymore since a certain little blue-eyed girl steals the show around here these days 

but I love him, as many shenanigans he manages to get himself into and as much as I wanna give him away sometimes ( I kid, not) hes still my little fur baby boy.

 

When Sienna was born, Danny took home her first hat that was put on her when she was all gooey and brand new so he can get used to her scent...when we brought her home from the hospital he sniffed her out a bit and has be great around her ever since. Its like he realized she was here to stay and he knew to love her right away. I have to admit I was nervous at first because he can be a brat, hes cute as pie but man he can be a little shit head. There are just certain random things in the house that he doesn't like for whatever reason and he feels the need to pee on them, those are the days I hes not my favorite... to say the least.

(these days are over for Mr. Charlie)

Funny story, he was out in the backyard the other day when mid pee (leg up an all) the sprinklers came on and scared the bejesus out of him...he ran so fast he almost slammed into the patio door ( I wish I had it on video)....since that day he wont step foot paw in the yard, so what that means for me is...walks during the day in Arizona's summer heat, with the baby and dog that doesnt do leash, needs to sniff every damn tree in the neighborhood as well as every passing dogs butt...

"IlovemydogIlovemydogIlovemydog"

you know the phrase "don't bite the hand that feeds you"

well he does...heaven forbid you should even look in his direction when hes got something to

 eat.

Even though Sienna steals the show around here, 

I love you too Charlie as bratty as you are...you were my first baby :)